Giving Back

Our little Emma Bean during her first days in the NICU

When Emma was born 5 weeks early, we knew why. I had pre-eclampsia. It's life threatening for mom and baby and the only cure is delivery. Some women are able to be put on bed rest for a few days or weeks in order to let their babies grow a little more before coming into the world. That wasn't the case with me. I was just lucky that I was as far along as I was when I developed the condition. A few weeks earlier and the outcome could have been much worse.

My first trip to the NICU to see Emma - 10 hours after her birth

Emma under the bili-lights

When my brother was born 8 weeks early in 1982, we didn't know why. We still don't know why he was so early. He weighed only 3 lbs 11 oz. I'm not sure how long he was, but I remember my dad telling me that from Andrew's knee to his ankle was the size of my dad's pinky. Unlike Emma, he was tiny.

Both Andrew and Emma had long NICU stays. Emma for 8 1/2 weeks. Andrew for about 3 weeks before he was sent back to the hospital where he was born to a special care nursery for another 2 weeks.

Happy and healthy NICU grads - Emma with Uncle Andrew last summer

Andrew and Emma are both lucky. They are both healthy today. Sure Emma has a life long medical condition, but she's a healthy girl with very few if any side effects from her hydrocephalus. If it weren't for the NICU, she/we might not have been so forunate.

Andrew and Emma aren't the only preemie stories I know. We have friends and family members who've been through this too and most of them, like my parents, don't know why their children were born prematurely.

September 11, 2008 - our last day in the NICU. After 58 days, we finally brought Emma home.

Since bringing Emma home from the hospital, I've wanted to do something to give back. The first few months were hard, of course, and I was focused on getting Emma's shunt working the right way. Then, we were getting ready to move. Then, we were settling in to our new house and new town. The excuses are endless, but not this year. Emma is almost 2 years old now. She's been home from the NICU for 19 months, and her shunt has been under control for almost 16 months. Dare I say ... Life is good! It's time to help other families dealing with having a sick baby.

On May 8th, I will be walking in the March of Dimes March for Babies in Boston in honor of Emma and Andrew, as well as our friends and families who know what it's like to go through the turmoil of a premature birth or the birth of sick baby. I will be walking with our NICU's team this year. (I'm also hoping Emma will ride in her stroller along with other NICU grads, but she's been on a bit of a stroller strike lately.)

The March of Dimes works to prevent babies from being born too soon, too small and/or very sick. The money raised will be used to help moms have healthy, full-term pregnancies and will help babies get a healthy start to life.

If you would like to support me, and the NICU team that took such good care of Emma, please click on the link below (or in the left sidebar) to go to my March for Babies page to donate. Thank you for helping me help other families who are coping with heartbreak of having a sick baby and prevent other families from going through this in the future.

New Kinds of Firsts

With any baby, especially your first, there are constantly new firsts. First smile, first laugh, first steps, first words. It's all exciting. As a parent, I've eagerly awaited each first. I've taken pictures of the firsts. Blogged about them. Someday, I may even get around to putting those first into a scrapbook. These are the firsts that you dream of while you're still a mommy-to-be and when you're holding that tiny little newborn in those first few months.

We're now into a new kind of 'firsts'. The firsts that you only think about once they happen. The firsts that really show you your baby is no longer a baby. The silly things like when you notice that your child now fidgets. Emma was mindlessly tapping her cup the other morning while we were watching Mickey Mouse together. Just tapping her cup. Just fidgeting. Babies don't fidget. Kids fidget.

Yesterday, Emma went to her first birthday party. Well, not really her first, but the first to which she was the invited guest. Sure the birthday girl's mom is in my book club and we're friends more than the girls are, but the invitation came addressed to 'Emma Leghorn'. The kids were between her age and about 4. There were parents there, but it was a kids' party with balloons, party hats, lots of playing and, of course, a princess cake.

Checking her purse to see if she has everything she needs for the party

When the invitation came, I was sort of excited to go buy a birthday present for our little friend, but then I started to worry about it. I had no idea what to get or how much to spend. I never thought about it before, but when your kid starts getting invited to birthday parties for their friends, it has the potential to get expensive. What do you do when it's 'birthday season' in your kid's pre-school class and they're invited to 5 birthday in a month? What do you do when you have no idea what the birthday child likes? Does she like princesses or does she hate all things frilly? What if he already has this toy or that toy? I worry and obsesses about everything and birthday party gifts are no different. I finally had to take a deep breath and snap out of it.

I headed to our local toy store. It's one of those small stores, insanely packed with specialty toys, educational toys and art supplies. Unique toys that you can't find at the 'big box' toy stores. Thank goodness the girl there was well versed in birthday party gifts and was able to answer all my questions and help me select a cute arts and crafts kit. She even wrapped it for me! Guess where I'm going the next time I need a gift!

Checking to see if there's room for Spider-Man (see she's not all ribbons and baby dolls) in her new purse before leaving for the party.

So Emma arrived, party dress on and gift in hand, said Happy Birthday to the party girl, found a few other little friends from art class and left me in the dust only needing my attention when it was time to eat and to change her diaper. If I ever worried (and, of course, I do) that she would have a hard time A)being away from me, or B) socializing, I can put those worries to rest. She's very independent. Is that a good thing?? Anyway, she had a great time and I enjoyed chatting with the other moms. It was a success!




After the party, we enjoyed the nice weather in our backyard. Emma brought me a dandelion for the first time. I had to laugh to myself because I remember collecting bouquets of dandelions to give to my mom. She always acted like they were so beautiful, sometimes putting them in a glass of water like a vase. So, of course, I showed the appropriate amount of appreciation and even showed her how to pick one with the stem attached.

'bootiful, gween glassesth'

This morning we looked through her first goodie bag from her first birthday party and found the beauties she is modeling above. She really is amassing a collection of very stylish shades! Ahhh ... I love these new firsts!

A New Look

I've decided to go for a different look. With the blog at least. I had a hard time letting go of my home made blog template, but after looking at some of the new fancy layouts, I decided to freshen thing up a bit. What do you think?

Girly Girl

You know your 1-1/2 year old daughter is a girly-girl when you take her to try shoes on and she:

1. Happily models the shoes you've picked out by walking up and down the shoe aisle looking at her new-shoe clad feet without complaining even when you try about 8 different pairs on,

2. Though she has trouble walking normally, she knows how to walk both with one shoe on while the other one, that is attached to the first, trails along behind, and with both shoes on still attached in the middle, without falling.

3. While modeling said shoes, especially the pink sparkly ones that you have no intention of buying, your little princess very matter-of-factly exclaims, "Oh, beautiful!" (or in Emma speak 'bootiful')

And if those three things are not enough to solidfy her girly-girl status, while you hold up a pair of shorts to try to see if they will fit her tiny little tushy, she might just grab those shorts by the hanger, hug them tight and spend the rest of her time in the store holding them up to her chest, saying 'Ooo! Baby isth wearing shortsth!' You might even have to very nicely ask her to hand them to the lady so we can pay for them and promise her that you will hand them right back so she can hold them on the way to the car and the whole ride home.

Oh how I wish I had pictures to illustrate all this, but alas, I was without camera on our excursion today.


BUT ... here's a picture of my girly-girl from this weekend in Connecticut.